So I am dipping my big toe in the water tonight. I don't really know where to start, I want to skip over the last 18 months and ignore the fact that it even happened. But it did and changed the dynamic's of my family into a million little pieces all over the kitchen floor. If you know me I hate to sweep so I have ignored them and then get pissy when I step on one or many of those proverbial shattered pieces. Life is a delicate balance between birth and death. But sometimes death can come as a relief, when the person who is dying has suffered an unimaginable disease. Such is the case with cancer. My mother, my father-in-law and my brother-in-law all in a matter of a few years. Some people handle this experience with faith and prayer and some don't. I am one who does.Then when it is a tragic accident, unexpected, it sucker punches you in the gut and you reel for months and maybe years. It depends on your faith in God I suppose.
Speaking of Birth, I became a "MiMi"! I have a new Princess Granddaughter! I was able to attend her birth. What a miracle. Her Royal Highness rules with a mighty
Speaking of growing, #18 (wow how and when did that happen) is getting ready to graduate this May. I am not ready to let this one go. Yet she is trying faster and faster to do her own thing. This is my girl who I have kept under my wing. Guns packed, locked and loaded, ready to draw when needed. But she wants to grow up. I was speaking with someone who reminded me that if we can raise our children to be responsible, kind, moral and respectful our job was done well. They are ready to become members of this society that will make a difference. They will still come back and need advice or even help from time to time, that's our job as a parents, but when they are ready let them go. That is going to be hard with this one.
Well #14 will not stop growing literally. She has taken off some time from dance this past year and a half to be in athletics. Her dad approves. She hates volleyball, likes basketball and LOVE'S (insert a little "MOTAB") Track. She runs the mile and a half and two mile. She is an endurance runner and knows how to bring it on home. She is hot and cold. She is up and down. WTH she is 14!
I turned 44 this month. I feel that old also. My hair is getting grayer, my "laugh lines" a little deeper and my hands look like my grandmothers when she was younger. I look like her. I think I act like her a little also. My cousin and I have the worst habit in the world we inherited from her. We are night owls. Can stay up till 1-2am in the morning, she has to go to work but I don't. So she is responsible, I am not. I do what I want and some days that means sleeping in till noon. But I tell myself that is because it is January. And from Christmas to about President's Day I get depressed. I have S.A.D. I have always had it. Spring will be here soon. Better medication for a better society they say. But it still does not work all the time and does make you tired. Go figure.